My father died a year ago today, marking the start of difficult season of loss and grieving that lasted, two months to the day, to Catherine’s death this January, and beyond.

It has been hard going, by times, and settling into this changed life is still a work in progress. Time has healed some things, and amplified others. There’s anger in grieving, all manner of it, and things to be reckoned with; as the anger subsides it reveals gentler layers underneath, and, for both my father and for Catherine, many of those gentler layers are only just now coming to the surface.

Of all the photos I have of me and Dad together, I like this one the best: in the fall of 2004, sixteen years ago, we were visiting Plitvice Lakes National Park in Croatia, part of an epic father-and-son trip to the old country. Toward the end of our walk through the park it started to rain.

And rain.

And rain.

We got soaked. Really really soaked.

But, as you can see from the smiles on our faces, we didn’t mind at all.

My father and I, especially in my teenage years, didn’t have the gentlest of relationships; of the arguments I’ve had in my life, the longest and most dug-in were with him. That we found ourselves in deepest Croatia, in the rain, with smiles on our faces, was a testament to our working through that.

You are missed and loved, Dad.

As the secrets of cooking for the household reveal themselves to me, the next step in my questing was baba ghanoush.

I’d imagined all sorts of alchemy would be required; turns out to be as simple as:

• Cut an eggplant in half, brush with olive oil, bake, cut side down, in a 400°F oven for 30 minutes.
• Scoop out the guts and combine with tahini, lemon juice, salt, cumin and olive oil.

That’s it. There’s a batch waiting for tomorrow’s snack curing in the refrigerator right now.

 When rearranging a drawer is restful: the magic of ‘pottering’:

Micro-pottering is defined as “those moments in the day when you do something that is not strictly necessary but gives you a short break… to readjust your thoughts.”

Not samples. Not covers. Somewhere in between.

• Beguiling Eyes from Stephen Fearing references Both Sides Now from Joni Mitchell.
• Save Us from Lennon Stella references I Love You Always Forever from Donna Lewis.
• Play It All Night Long from from Warren Zevon references Sweet Home Alabama from Lynrd Skynrd. Or it is Sweet Home Alabama from a parallel universe.

Others?

Oliver picked up new eyeglasses this afternoon, the first new pair since his stylish orange and blue ones, now retired, from spring 2017.

We returned to Matheson Eyewear, and received customary good service and fine selection.

Catherine was clearly the liaison to pioneer days in our household; had the end times arrived before she died, it would have been her out in the yard keeping the cooking fire burning and tending the potato batteries to keep our laptops charged.

As such, any responsibility for cast iron cookware was clearly in her bailiwick. As a result, our trusty cast iron frying pan sat unused and unloved in a corner for most of this year.

Then, recently, Dave Atkinson, who has more than a trace of pioneer-liaison in him, wrote lovingly about his own cast iron; then I read a glowing reference for cast iron in my recipe for squash and chickpea skillet pie in a cookbook. And so I decided it was time to learn how to season the unloved frying pan.

Fortunately I found a “this is really simple; don’t overthink it” guide online: rub oil all over the pan until it positively glows, in the oven for 30 minutes at 400°F, repeat. I repeated 3 times. The result: a beautifully seasoned piece of pioneer non-stick cookware.

I celebrated by making said squash and chickpea pie.

Friend of the blog, and friend of the Island, Nell Bang-Jensen is one of the creative forces behind Philadelphia’s Theatre Horizon, a theatre that is making the best of coronatimes by launching myriad bold new ventures, including Virtual Drama Experience for children, a move to Zoom for their Autism Drama Program, and a series of works presented from home called Art Houses:

Professional award-winning theatre artists are paired with local area households to create an evening of original theater. Each performance will expand on the concept of family in the era of quarantine and explore the sensational moments that can be found within the familiar every day.

The first Art Houses production is coming up on December 5, 2020 on Zoom:

Meet Becky Bradbeer, a fierce lover of theater, as she creates her own performance from home. Exploring ideas of independence, caregiving, and performativity while living in a body with cerebral palsy, Becky opens up the curtains to her vibrant life and the unexpected turns that lead to this moment in the pandemic. 

Better than your average Zoom, the work includes a package-in-the-mail:

Ticket holders will also receive a “mystery box” in the mail before the performance with contents chosen by Becky. These boxes will provide a tactile relationship to the performance, and mimic the surprise of a live show.

I’ve purchased two tickets, and encourage you to consider joining us in the virtual audience.

Non la is the name for a traditional Vietnamese conical hat; it’s also the name of a new vegetarian café on University Avenue (bringing the number of Vietnamese restaurants in Charlottetown to nine; I’ve updated the map accordingly):

Although today was the Remembrance Day holiday here in Charlottetown, Non La was open, and I took the opportunity of Oliver and I being home for the day to place an online order; we then walked up, in the late autumn sunshine, to pick it up.

Despite having ordered 30 minutes previous to our arrival, we had to wait a bit for our order–two bánh mì, a smoothie and a brown coffee–to be ready. We were given glasses of water and invited to sit while we waited; there’s a pleasant little dining room out front with seating for about 8 people.

The wait was worth it: we collected our food and walked over to the Prince Street School steps to eat it. The bread was perfect, and the sandwich well-spiced and very tasty. Non La catapults to near the top of my bánh mì preferences in the city (imagine being able to have enough places to get bánh mì in Charlottetown that one can have preferences!).

Non La is having its official grand opening from November 18 to 25, 2020, and offering 15% off all orders that week.

Thanks to Martin and his foodie contact for pointing the way.