In the corner of my mind I knew that local coffee baron and multimedia magnate Campbell Webster was involved with the production of a television program called My Messy Bedroom.

I assumed, given the prevalance of Island-produced childrens’ television (viz. shows about mathematics and mice), that with a title like that, this was some sort of Degrassi High-like show about a quirky family with kids who couldn’t keep their rooms clean.

Imagine my surprise, then, when I happened upon the show by accident on cable one night and found that the plot revolved around not wacky kids and their neatness problems, nor even multiplication or the adventures of a gang of mice, but rather sex, chocolate, vaginas, and other such wonderfulia.

I have since come to learn that the series is the television version of a syndicated newspaper column which, given the general aversion to open discussion of concupiscent pursuits on the Island, is not syndicated here.

Or perhaps the names of our newspapers are too long. The MMB website lists the publications the column is carried in as all having only one-word titles: Hour, Here, View, Echo, Pulse, Snap, Uptown, See, Monday and Current. Okay, so there’s Free Spirit in New York. But that’s American, so it doesn’t count. Maybe if we shortened the name of the local papers here to the much hipper-sounding Buzz or Guardian — “Hi, I’m a reporter at Guardian” sounds very cool — we would be released to participate full-on in the sexual revolution.

That all said, my real reason for writing about My Messy Bedroom is to congratulate Campbell and company on being nominated for a Gemini Award. Bravo.