Smoking After Sex

Catherine is the first woman I’ve dated1 who’s not a smoker. During my time in the minor leagues of relationships in the mid- to late-1980s, I went out with a series of women who smoked — some a little, some a pack a day.

As a result, despite an unblemished record of being a non-smoker myself (well, there was that unfortunate cuckolding incident in Cuba, but we won’t count that), in addition to the whole set of “smoking kills,” “smoking is gross,” “smoking causes cancer” associations, I’ve had a latent “smoking is sexy” vibe hanging out in the deep recesses of my mind. Something about beer and cigarettes and sweltering nights and, well, you get the picture.

Today, though, I walked out of the office on the way to lunch and there was an otherwise quite striking woman catching a cigarette outside the office across the street. And I realized that I no longer find smoking sexy in any way at all. It’s a horrible habit with no allure whatsoever. Lauren Bacall be damned.

1. Catherine and I have been “dating” for 14 years next week, which makes me think we need a new word to describe our arrangement.

Comments

Ann's picture
Ann on September 22, 2005 - 19:24 Permalink

My date and I have chosen to call each other unindicted co-conspiritors

Dan's picture
Dan on September 22, 2005 - 20:06 Permalink

Lovers.

head scratcher's picture
head scratcher on September 23, 2005 - 12:45 Permalink

Lovers in a dangerous time..”

Peter Rukavina's picture
Peter Rukavina on September 23, 2005 - 15:22 Permalink

These are all nouns — I’m looking for a new verb.

jenkew's picture
jenkew on September 23, 2005 - 17:31 Permalink

I always like “fighting crime”.

head scratcher's picture
head scratcher on September 23, 2005 - 17:53 Permalink

or ‘making pizza’

Cyn's picture
Cyn on September 23, 2005 - 19:56 Permalink

sharing” works.

Mandy's picture
Mandy on September 24, 2005 - 13:49 Permalink

Common lawing”

oliver's picture
oliver on September 24, 2005 - 18:05 Permalink

I always liked to describe Sophie and myself in the traditional way: Living in sin. I used that at the DMV in North Carolina and the woman at the counter smiled and said “Well, you said it and I didn’t.”