I kill airlines.

Let this note act as a warning to the new airlines of the world: deal with me at your peril.

It all started with the ill-fated Triton Airways, based in St. John’s, Newfoundland. When they announced their launch, with great fares from Toronto to Charlottetown, I made an immediate reservation for my old friend Stephen to come a visit us for a week. One corporate thing led to another. Flights were rescheduled. Flights were cancelled. Coupons were promised and never received. I don’t believe Triton ever actually flew a single flight. Anywhere.

Next I set my sights on the ill-fated Atlantic Island Airways. Again, they offered great fares on Charlottetown to Toronto. In this case they actually got off the ground, and I actually did fly one of their PEI tartan-encrusted flights up to Toronto and back. The flight went fine; I was a little put off by the torn carpet and general unkemptness of the interior of the plane, but it flew fine, which, in the end, is the point. Within a month, Atlantic Island Airways was out of business. I ended up going to the auction of their remaining assets at an airplane hanger in Summerside, and bought an executive-style desk chair, which I used for almost 5 years before it gave out.

And then, most recently, I thought that I might try out Roots Air to get out to Vancouver to see my brother Johnny. In anticipation, I went to their website and registered for their frequent flyer program. A month later, no more Roots Air.

Today in the mail I got the card pictured here, along with a nice letter from Alaska Airlines telling me about the demise of Roots Air, and that my frequent flyer account would now be transferred to their airline. So now I’m primed, ready and equipped to start raking in the mileage on all my Anchorage-Portland flights.

By the way, I never flew CanJet, which explains why it didn’t go out of business by rather just merged into Canada 3000. I’ve never flown WestJet, which explains why it’s still in business. And, come to think of it, when an Air Canada flight had mechanical troubles last fall, I was switched to a Canadian Airlines Charlottetown to Halifax flight. A month later, Canadian Airlines was consumed by Air Canada.

Like I said, beware.