Driving Test

Try this test: get up at 6:30 a.m. and get into your car. Drive to downtown Charlottetown. Now drive gaily about downtown Charlottetown. Pause. Return to downtown Charlottetown at 5:05 p.m. and repeat.

Notice how when you are driving around downtown Charlottetown at 6:30 a.m. all of the lights change in perfect time to your driving? It as if the hand of God is waving you through.

Notice how at 5:50 p.m. you seem to hit every red light in town, as if Satan himself was conspiring to keep you frustrated?

I have a suspicion that the well-minded people who figure out when the lights should be red and when they should be green did their figuring in the dead of early morning, thus factoring out the deadening effect of traffic.

I’ll tell you one thing, when you’re zipping around town at 6:30 a.m. with God’s hands waving, driving feels like a special, magical thing.


.'s picture
. on November 30, 2001 - 08:24 Permalink

This may also be due to the fact that turning arrows never occur when there are no cars turning left; these arrows are triggered by sensors in the street. Other lights also remain green in one direction when there is no cross-traffic. So you’re really experiencing the default state before it is disturbed by traffic.

Steven Garrity's picture
Steven Garrity on November 30, 2001 - 17:04 Permalink


Kevin O's picture
Kevin O on November 30, 2001 - 17:19 Permalink

Try this driving test. Go to Yarmouth the day before rememberance day. Play around and buy a shirt at Shappiro’s clothing store. Then get up the next moring at about 6:45, go, have breakfast and tank up the car at the Shell in downtown Yarmouth. Then at precisely 8:00 am have your front wheels touch the pavement of the street and head for Charlottetown. At precisely 1:00 pm pull up in front of the Tim Horton’s on Kent street. If you do this, you will have covered a little over 615km at an average speed of just under 125km/hr. WARNING: you may need to exceed 115 miles per hour to do this. When you arrive at Tim’s and slurp into your large DC you’ll feel the hand of God. If you fail, you may never feel The Hand” ever again. (I stopped on the slab in Cornwall (approx 11km short of Tim’s) in 4 hrs 50 mins).