“And beets taste like dirt and despair”

This piece by K’eguro Macharia may be the single best thing ever written about vegetables.

Or at least about beets:

I have roasted beets. I have roasted them when they are wrapped in foil and I have roasted them when they are wrapped in banana leaves and I have roasted them without any covering. I have roasted them on a bed of whole spices and I have roasted them on their own. Roasting does nothing magical. Roasted beets still taste like beet. And beets taste like dirt and despair.

Macharia has no love for cabbage either, which should cause my friend Ann, doyen of cabbage, to spring into restorative action.